The Goodbye Weekend

We arrived Friday afternoon and cooked a batch of food at the condo for Stefan, Lukas and their friends. Saturday morning we were at the church early and Kalia’s casket was open for a short time. It was good for me to see her. Mary started crying though, and didn’t stop until the service was over… probably 2 hours.

Everyone from the family spoke; first Tracie, who recited a very beautiful and heart-wrenching poem she wrote called "No Poem", followed by Lukas and Stefan. I was very proud of both of them. I know Lukas would have preferred to just sit and listen, but he summoned the courage to speak, and delivered a very mature and dignified eulogy. Mike told a story about driving the kids cross-country one summer in a Geo. And then Nathan, Kalia's best friend, had some very insightful stories to share about their adventures growing up together.

The service continued at the cemetery with a very short, graveside memorial, and concluded with a nice luncheon sponsored by a group affiliated with the church. I have never seen so many trays of perfect cheesy potatoes in my life! It was one of a thousand little things that happened this weekend that contributed to bearing the unbearable; from the moment we accidently cut in the Southwest boarding line, to the Dunkin Donuts “incident”. Remind me to tell you about it sometime.

I should acknowledge that this weekend was a lot easier to cope with thanks to a very good friend; Joanne's presence was a factor in helping Mary, Mike and I through a tough time.

Saturday evening, once the sun set, and the snow began to fall, the flames of Kalia's memorial bonfire developed into a full blaze. The day came to a close in a magical moment as Kalia’s family and friends gathered around the fire to drink a little hot chocolate and share in her memory.

The Buddhists, in a beautiful and fitting expression of wisdom, say, “Your end, which is endless, is as a snowflake dissolving in the pure air.”